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As an Inclusion Consultant, I’ve found one thing that’s missing across the board in the theater industry—feedback and feedback resilience. When there’s a power dynamic at play at every level of an industry (as is the case in theater), feedback can unfortunately be used negatively. But is feedback always negative? Or is it possible to change the narrative here?
In today’s episode, we’re diving into everything from industry-wide and individual barriers to feedback, feedback triggers, and mindset. We’re also getting into the difference between constructive criticism and negative feedback. No matter if you’re a director, actor, or member of the audience—you have a role to play in creating a culture that’s open and ready to receive, act on, and celebrate feedback! Enjoy the show!
In this episode, we cover:
What types of feedback already exist and are missing in the theater industry
How do we give (and take) effective feedback
Barriers to feedback in the theater industry
The role mindset plays in feedback resilience
How to create a feedback culture in the arts
It’s a lot to think about—what can you do to encourage a culture of feedback in an organization, whether you're a leader, an artist, or an audience member? Feedback is at the heart of creating inclusive spaces, and it's critical we start treating it like the crucial skill that it is. I look forward to hearing feedback from you as well—DM us on Instagram anytime!
Links & Mentioned Resources
Thanks for the Feedback (book)
Connect with Kira:
Thanks for joining me on this episode of Inclusive Stages! If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a review on Apple or Spotify to help me reach even more theater makers, theater artists, and theater lovers who want to make our industry a better place for everyone.
Thanks to our music composer, Zachary McConnell, and our producer, Leah Bryant.
More about the Inclusive Stages Podcast
Welcome to 'Inclusive Stages' -- the go-to weekly podcast for theater makers, theater artists, and theater lovers who want to make our industry a better place for everyone. We'll chat with actors, directors, designers, scholars, and more about the current landscape of the theater scene and get their thoughts on how we can do better.
Host Kira Troilo will also give you a sneak peek into live EDI coaching sessions and offer actionable tips for creating more equitable, inclusive, and empathetic theater spaces that support and value the diversity of artists and audiences. Join the conversation, and let's collectively shape the future of human-first theater, one stage at a time.
This post may contain affiliate links, so I may earn a small commission when you make a purchase through links on my site at no additional cost to you.
The unedited podcast transcript for this episode of the Inclusive Stages podcast follows:
Kira Troilo (00:09.759)
Hi theater friends, welcome to another episode of Inclusive Stages. Today I'm making good on a promise that I made in the last solo episode, and I am going to talk about one of the most important, most underrated skills that I think is missing from our industry. We haven't been educated about it, and yet it is at the heart of all of our creative work. Have you guessed what it is yet? Usually when I say the word, it elicits groans, so get ready to groan. It's feedback.
and feedback resilience. Now, you may be thinking, what does feedback have to do with inclusion? And really, it's everything, friends. It truly is everything. And I hope you agree with me after I break it all down here. Now, some common ways that we do utilize feedback, I wanna start with. You know, the very common ways that we do use it when, blah, I'll be back up.
Kira Troilo (01:12.861)
Now there are some very common ways that we do utilize feedback in the industry at the moment. You know, think audience feedback, obviously, you know, we perform on stage and the audience responds and we collect their feedback. Sometimes we collect their feedback through surveys even, or asking in the lobby afterwards, but you know, that's tied to profits and engaging a community. So, you know, we do that.
You know, think about directors to actors. So if you are familiar with being in a rehearsal room, a director gives a note. The etiquette is for the actor to say thank you, take the note and move on. That is a form of feedback that we do practice. Or, you know, an artistic director to a director. Maybe notes, you know, feedback on does the direction of the show align with the theater company.
or organization that's feedback. Or maybe even board members to executive directors or artistic directors, giving notes about any wide array of things like budgetary choices or artistic choices.
Kira Troilo (02:36.807)
anything like that that a board member could have an opinion on, that's feedback. But there are some key missing connections there, I would say. So in all of those situations, it's really feedback from one person of power to a person without as much power in that area. audiences determine whether theaters...
That one we go back.
Kira Troilo (03:10.8)
Audiences determine whether or not there are audiences at shows, right? Which makes it, you know, that they have the power to decide, are they going to go to the show or not? So that's a position of power, know, directors to actors, position of power, and so on. So what about feedback from artist to leader or from staff to board or really even from artist to artist?
We don't really practice that in our industry. And I'm making a general statement there, but write to me and let me know if you disagree. But I think in general, we just haven't been taught these crucial skills of how do we give effective feedback and how do we receive effective feedback.
It's not something I ever learned, really ever, and you know, there's a case to be made for feedback and feedback resilience being a huge skill that we are missing in general in society, but I think it is so crucial in theater and the arts. feedback resilience, what do I mean? So, it's like any other kind of resilience. It's not something that's inherent in us. It's a skill, right? It's a skill that we can practice and it's a muscle that we can strengthen.
And why would we want to do that? Feedback is crucial to learning and growing. It is essential in problem solving, in innovation, trust building, mission and vision alignment, improved collaboration, community building. The list goes on and on and on. And those are things that are kind of important in creative environments, right? So it's something that's worth diving into since the benefits of it are so
crucial in our industry. Mission and vision, innovation, building trust quickly, problem solving, it's so important. So here we go. I'm going to make the case for why this is the number one missing skill in our industry. So first, let's just understand what we're talking about here. What is feedback? I think, again, like I said, most people are going to groan and say, might immediately have a negative connotation. But feedback isn't inherently negative.
Kira Troilo (05:30.559)
To me, feedback can be defined by three key characteristics. It's specific, it's actionable, and it's delivered with empathy and respect. That's feedback to me, and that's the difference between a constructive criticism and negative feedback, and that negative heart -squeezing lump in your throat feeling when you might consider feedback.
So to me, no, it's just information, right? And it's specific, it's actionable, so it's geared toward improving. So that's the difference for me between something that's just inherently like a negative comment that is not meant to help an organization or a person grow or get better in any way. I'm thinking about social media and just, you
There's just like tough criticism that's not meant to go anywhere. But feedback, the kind of feedback that we're looking to collect is actionable so we can do something with it. And then again, delivered with empathy and respect. So I also say that feedback is kind. So if you're sharing, you're taking your time and energy to share something with someone because you care about them or that organization or that person and you want it to be better.
That's information that's delivered with empathy and respect. So that's what I'm talking about when I talk about feedback. Now, I wanna talk about some common barriers to feedback, specifically in our industry, because there are so many barriers. It's not just like, don't live, we don't operate in an industry where we can just say, yes, can I have your feedback? And,
you know, the gates are open and everyone feels great and we're sharing our thoughts. No, there's so many barriers. Like a fear of retaliation, for example. So feeling like a difficult person to work with. And, you know, as freelance artists, we can't afford to be quote unquote difficult or seen as someone who's going to cause problems. So that fear of retaliation is very real and very swift in this industry.
Kira Troilo (07:48.847)
There's a lack of trust, of course, again, with all these power dynamics in our industry. So can you trust that your feedback will be taken kindly? Can you trust that it will be taken at all or that it goes anywhere? There are also generational and cultural differences to consider.
Kira Troilo (08:20.029)
So is feedback even valued? How is feedback valued and how can it be given and can it be received? Again, from maybe an older person to a younger person or a younger person to an older person, what does that mean? There's also just a lack of self -awareness can be a barrier. What happens to you?
when you are receiving tough feedback. I think that's something we all should sit with and just, know, it's a tough thing to grapple with. I speak from experience when you really get curious about what goes on for you and someone says something that strikes you, that maybe hurts you. How do you take that? And can you...
can you mine anything useful from it without letting your own personal reactions get in the way? Of course, you know, and in theater, we're all very emotional people, but that doesn't mean that we've taken the time to like, kind of dig into where that comes from and how, and how we can, you know, really cope with it.
There's also in our industry, just time constraints in general. You know, we're doing these processes that are so quick that it can feel like there's not time for feedback. We're also in an industry that is resistant to change. That's like a whole other episode too, but feedback is about change, right? You know, sometimes feedback is about keeping some things the same that work great, you know,
Kira Troilo (10:07.721)
We're very stubborn in our industry and we're stuck in a lot of old ways. So that gets in our way as well. You know, also say a lack of clear feedback channels. So who do I go to with my feedback is a common question. Inconsistent feedback practices. And then, you know, there's just also an overemphasis on criticism, which makes feedback feel yucky, which makes us not want to give or receive it. And there it is. And then also,
perception of feedback is a one -way street. Like I talked about, you know, I think the director to actor giving a note and then the actor suppose that the etiquette is supposed to be that the actor just says thank you and takes it. We don't in this industry really encourage an actor to take time to ask a question of the note. We want them to just take it. And that's for a number of reasons, you know, but note sessions in general for theater could go on for a very long time if they were conversations rather than just giving notes, but
but it can exacerbate this perception of feedback as a one -way street. And then there's a lack of celebration often around accomplishments that come from taking and incorporating feedback. I don't think we celebrate feedback enough and that also gives it a bad rap.
Kira Troilo (11:52.531)
So those are some of the barriers in our industry. Now I think it's important to also talk about some of the key barriers that we encounter in ourselves when it comes to feedback. Like I said, self -awareness and self -reflection is really hard, but we are not going to be able to receive feedback that can help us as people or organizations grow without.
you know, spending some time with some of these barriers internally. So I'm taking a lot of my information from an amazing book that I love and actually teach from in our cohort certification program. The book is called Thanks for the Feedback, the Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well.
Kira Troilo (12:50.323)
book is by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen. I think everyone should read this regardless of if you're a theatre person or not, but if you're here you're probably a theatre and entertainment person. So get this book. I'm putting it in the show notes. It will change your life. It might make you a little nauseous, it will, I'm telling you, will improve relationships. It will improve your relationship with yourself. It'll improve work. It's just amazing. So I'm taking some of these concepts from that book.
That book doesn't specifically talk about the arts industry, so I'm creating my own lean here, my own weigh -in. But yeah, so one of the personal barriers I'll talk about is feedback triggers. So in this book, they talk about three common or three feedback triggers that are generally what we're dealing with. The first is called the truth trigger. And this is when feedback feels to you like it's wrong.
or unfair or unhelpful. Like that's just not the way it is, right? It's like someone tells you that the sky is purple and you say, no, that's just incorrect, right? That's not the truth. It's triggering what feels like the truth to you and therefore it can't be received. Then there's a relationship trigger. I...
I think about this when it comes to our industry. The relationship trigger means that the feedback is colored by what we think about the person who's giving the feedback and how we feel treated by them. Right? So if we feel like someone is treating us poorly or that they don't care or that they, you know, there may be a number of things that you think about any given person, that's going to color
how you receive the feedback. You might not even be able to receive the feedback because you're too busy thinking about what's wrong with them and why we shouldn't listen to them, right? Another big one is the identity trigger. This one really gets me. So this is feedback that's an attack on the story we tell ourselves about ourselves. So let me say that again. It feels like an attack on the story that we tell ourselves about.
Kira Troilo (15:09.361)
ourselves about who we are. So if there's feedback that feels like an attack to your own identity, there's really nothing more powerful than an attack on your identity, right? Who you are as a person. So if you can't get past that, then you're not going to be able to hear feedback that just feels like the opposite of who you are. I'm talking, you know,
if you think of yourself as an ally to the LGBTQ community, for example, and someone calls you a homophobe, that's gonna feel like an identity trigger, right? That's not who I am. So I can't receive that feedback. So the truth trigger, relationship trigger, identity trigger, those are all things that can get in the way of receiving feedback. But if you can sift through what's really going on for you,
you might be able to find something helpful in feedback, even if it feels like it's not the truth or you don't like the person or it comes up against your identity. There might be something there if you can get out of your way. Let's also talk about shifters and absorbers. I love this concept they talk about in the book. And I think you may...
Identify with one of these. You know, we're not all just like one thing all the time, but I know that I identify in one way. So let's see what you think. Shifters. So these are people who, when they get feedback, they want to shift it to someone else. It is not me, right? It's not my fault. I didn't do that. It's someone else's fault. They just want to shift all the blame if there's blame in the feedback. So
That's one kind of personality profile there when it comes to feedback. The other one is the opposite, and it's absorbers. And this is the people who are like, it's all me. It's all my fault. I am a bad person. I shouldn't even be in this role. I can't believe I let this happen. You get the idea. So those two things can get in the way as well. If we're all about, you know, if feedback comes to us and we just want to shift it away,
Kira Troilo (17:25.565)
or if feedback comes to us and we just internalize it to an unhealthy level, neither of those is actually helpful in receiving the feedback and creating action out of it.
Kira Troilo (17:42.727)
And next I want to talk about a fixed versus growth mindset. This is huge. You know, when I do exercises where I talk to groups about values, I often share that one of my values is growth. And I constantly go back to that as a North Star, because when one of your values is growth, that means that you have to get comfortable with not always being right or not often being right.
Every opportunity, experience is an opportunity to evolve and grow. So if we see our traits, this is talking now about a growth mindset. If we see our traits and abilities as evolving, as capable of growth, then you can take feedback and even rely on feedback to start a practice of self -assessment, which can lead you to grow.
and this is, know, that growth mindset, that growth identity. If your identity is something that can grow and shift and evolve, then you're not going to be hurt so much, right? If something comes up against your identity trigger. So here's another one to consider. So, a fixed, a fixed mindset, right? Is the opposite of that. So if you consider yourself to be the way that you are, those are your traits. Those are your abilities. You're done. You're finished. That's fixed.
So here's the example, you know, that comes up for me. It's someone saying like, well, I'm not, I'm not a fill in the blank, right? Rather than I continue to be curious about my own thoughts and actions. I rely on feedback to grow and self assess and re -examine, right? So rather than an identity that's fixed that can't change or shift or anything that like you can't
Feedback can't really penetrate that, right? Feedback can only penetrate when the person on the receiving end is open to growth and to evolution. So just considering, if you think about yourself, what are some stories and what are some things you tell yourself about yourself? And does that support a fixed mindset or a growth mindset?
Okay, so now that we've talked about the things that can get in our way, let's talk about a feedback culture. And this is a concept that I'm just so passionate about because I don't think that feedback happens in a silo. think feedback as a culture is the thing that's going to help individuals within any company, organization, or project build that trust, know, feel that security.
feel that they can get past those barriers and share ideas and thoughts. So if it's a culture and not just a, I have this feedback, I'm not sure if or how it's going to be received. But instead, this is a place and a group of people that values my input. And they value even challenges to the status quo because they're committed to change and that they understand that feedback is kind.
not negative. So, you know, we talk about a feedback culture. That's somewhere that values open, transparent, and continuous communication. All levels are encouraged to share positive and constructive feedback without fear of reprisal. That's important because the culture of feedback is really the only thing that's going to show over time that people who share feedback are not
are not getting retaliated against,
Kira Troilo (21:57.547)
And feedback is then in this culture of feedback, it's a natural and essential part of professional development and growth. So it just, right, amazing overall. We want the innovation and creativity that can come from it. We also want to be able to spot minor issues before they turn major. So we think about equity, diversity, and inclusion. If we have a culture of feedback, then you know, you're going to hear little things that might need attending to early on.
rather than having things build and build and build and build until they blow up and they become a huge issue. And that's where, you know, feedback is not kind and considerate, but feedback just is an outburst because it can't be held in any longer. So, you know, that's, that's a huge, that's something huge to consider for a feedback culture. It's just imperative and it's, you know,
not to talk about the benefits of higher retention and people going and saying, this company is really great. I felt safe working there and sharing my opinion. took my opinion, excuse me. They took my opinion to heart, et cetera, et cetera. So feedback culture, it's just so crucial. So how can we create a feedback culture in this industry?
I think that there's so many ways, you know, as a consultant who goes into many rooms myself, I like to do regular temp checks. So, you know, just going into a rehearsal room and with no agenda, just, just being there, you know, as someone they know, the room knows is there to receive feedback if it's, if it's there.
Kira Troilo (23:56.467)
So regular temp checks, right? Anonymous feedback channels. So are you creating ways for folks in your spaces to contribute feedback, but they're not quite feeling trust or safe yet. So just giving them an anonymous way to share, to start. There's leadership role modeling. the best way to, or one of the best ways I should say in my opinion,
to demonstrate the safety of feedback is
Kira Troilo (24:49.958)
is for leaders to model what it looks like to...
Kira Troilo (25:13.651)
Another really important way to show that a company is committed to a feedback culture or a group is committed to a feedback culture is for a leadership to be modeling what that looks like. So if leaders are actively showing that they can take feedback with grace and they can output action from it, that starts to show that, OK, these people who are leaders in the space
can actually process and deal with feedback. We also want to follow up with action plans. This is huge in theater. think, especially with such short processes and shows and projects, feedback can feel like it goes into a void and then disappears, never to be thought of again. So I really like just following up regularly with feedback updates.
So hey, you what would it look like if every week it's, hey, here's the feedback we received this past week and here's what we're taking into consideration and here's what we're taking action on. You know, when people start to kind of see a, a back and forth, that they see that their feedback means something and goes somewhere, then they're going to be more apt to share in the future, right?
And I think it's important to acknowledge and celebrate contributions. So taking that negativity out of feedback and really harnessing the spirit of this is a gift to us or to me. And it's really valued. And when people feel heard and valued, that's where we get that inclusive culture that we are all here to learn how to do, right? That's how we do it.
Kira Troilo (27:11.167)
So those are just some ideas for you. Just in summary, want to just, as an industry, I think, and as individuals within it, I think we need to really understand that feedback isn't negative. It can be crucial to the survival of our industry. If it's specific, if it's actionable, and if it's delivered with empathy and respect, then that is
valuable, that's really valuable. We need to just grapple with these barriers to feedback in our industry as a whole, and then grapple with those barriers within ourselves, like specific triggers, like are you a shifter or an absorber? Are you in a growth mindset or a fixed mindset? And then again, what can you do in your role to encourage a culture of feedback in an organization, whether you're a leader, an artist, an audience member, you know, what...
What are some things that you can do to make sure that a culture of feedback is being fostered in any environment? A lot to think about, a lot to consider. Like I said, there's a really amazing book that can help you through the concept of feedback that I'm linking to in the show notes. Thanks for the feedback. feedback is something that's...
very much on my mind is at the heart of creating inclusive spaces. And I think it's so important that we start treating it like the crucial skill that it is. I really want feedback training for artists and leaders and people in our industry. I think that would be so amazing.
Kira Troilo (29:09.735)
So let me know what you think. I always wanna hear what you think. So, you know, please head over to inclusivestages .com backslash connect or DM us on Instagram at inclusive stages or message us on LinkedIn. I'd love to hear from you on this topic of feedback. How did this feel to you? Is it something you feel like, are you passionate like me and feel like we need to invest in skills like this so that we can create more inclusive environments?
I'd love to hear what you think and what you want to hear more of.
And yeah, regardless, I hope you took something from today. I hope this was helpful. Thank you so much for being with us as always. I'm always grateful that you join in to listen and be in conversation around some of these topics with us.
So thank you so much as always for joining us. I'm so grateful to have you as a part of these important conversations and I look forward to hearing feedback from you as well.
Kira Troilo (30:45.68)
So please don't hesitate to share your feedback with us and we hope that wherever you are, you have a great rest of the day and we'll see you here next time.
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